It is our truth that we don't not always fit in in every circle. I have learned that my truth is that though I may feel like I don't fit in I am still chosen to belong. That despite my preferences, my will, sometimes where I live, where I work, who he has given to me is exactly what he has designed for me. So in these situations where I feel like I don't fit, that I'm different, that I'm not as outgoing, as eloquent, as glamorous: He says YET I chose you to belong here.
I need you to be here. I've equipped you to be here. I've equipped you to share not your message, not your brand, but my message, to be my messenger, to be my ambassador to be in this place and speak. There's a scripture that always spoke to me because I struggle with a bit of performance and social anxiety. It's Luke 12:12 and it says...." in that hour, the Spirit will give you the words to speak." And so he says to me lean on me when you feel that familiar angst of not fitting in and my spirit will remind you who you are. Don't shy away from these spaces. I need you to be here. Whatever your history may be in these situations, feeling more comfortable around certain groups of people, the ones you are uncomfortable around are the ones who need that different perspective. It takes coming out of one's comfort zone for growth. It takes boldness and confidence, that many times I feel like I do not have. Luckily, His word says that I can come boldly before the throne of grace to ask for help and mercy in a time of need.
Lately, I have felt like a time of need has been in this holiday season where there is so much on the schedule. It feels difficult to show up to different spaces and feel joy when you are trying to cross off to dos for the kids' holiday parties, buying/wrapping gifts, encouraging others who may have had loss and plan your own travel or time off. My impulse is to hide instead of choosing to lean on HIm for the strength and compassion to speak life to myself and each and every person I come across. He has told me spend time time with Him.... hide in Him. Don't hide from people, hide in me. Hide in my word. Hide in my song. Hide in my praise. Don't give up. You've got this. You belong here. I chose you to be here. I chose you to be their mother. I chose you to be their sister-in-law. The oldest daughter. I destined you to be in this place. This is where you belong.
Reflection:
1.In what spaces are you struggling to feel like you fit in, but a deeper tug is on you that you belong?
2. How are you finding rest ( your hideout) in this holiday season?
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